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Doctor slang is a dying art
http://www.x404.co.uk/forum/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=12926		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  steve74 [ Tue Mar 08, 2011 5:21 pm ]
Post subject:  Doctor slang is a dying art
Doctor slang is a dying art:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/3159813.stm

Quote:
The inventive language created by doctors the world over to insult their patients - or each other - is in danger of becoming extinct.

TOP MEDICAL ABBREVIATIONS:

CTD - Circling the Drain (A patient expected to die soon)
GLM - Good looking Mum
GPO - Good for Parts Only
TEETH - Tried Everything Else, Try Homeopathy
UBI - Unexplained Beer Injury
NFN - Normal for Norfolk
FLK - Funny looking kid

DBI refers to "Dirt Bag Index", and multiplies the number of tattoos with the number of missing teeth to give an estimate of the number of days since the patient last bathed.


Whoever thought Doctors had such a healthy sense of humour!
:P
Author:  Paul1965 [ Tue Mar 08, 2011 6:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Doctor slang is a dying art
ER used to have loads of these, so much so that a book I bought about the series had a Glossary at the back.

BOUNCE BACK: Someone who was discharged who's readmitted.
CODE BROWN: A bed full of excrement. :lol:
CRISPY CRITTER: A person burned to death.
DONOR CYCLES: Motorcycles (accident victims make good organ donors).
ECU: Eternal care unit (morgue).
GOK: God only knows.
HAND THEM A BIBLE SO THEY CAN STUDY FOR THE FINAL: About to die.
LGFD: Looks good from doorway. A patient who complains but looks fine.
PINK PUFFER: Someone with emphysema who has difficulty exhaling.
O SIGN: Mouth gaping open when unconscious.
Q SIGN: O sign plus tongue hanging out.
Author:  mikepgood [ Tue Mar 08, 2011 9:11 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Doctor slang is a dying art
TUBE: totally unneccessary breast examination
Author:  lumbthelesser [ Tue Mar 08, 2011 11:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Doctor slang is a dying art
mikepgood wrote:
TUBE: totally unneccessary breast examination

:lol: I fail to see how *any* breast examination could be unnecessary.
Author:  cloaked_wolf [ Tue Mar 08, 2011 11:58 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Doctor slang is a dying art
Okay, first and foremost, that article is EIGHT years old! It was published in 2003. Why are you posting it now?

Secondly, I haven't seen evidence of these "slang" acronyms in any of the hospitals that I've worked at in the last four years and not once in any of the rotations I went through as a medical student over the six years prior to that. This means in Wessex at least these haven't been in mainstream medical documentation for around ten years. Having said that, some of them have been used verbally, informally between doctors, myself included.

Thirdly, given that notes are now used more frequently by non-doctors, non-healthcare professionals and even patients themselves, no one in their right mind would document anything that could get them into trouble. In fact, if you examine letters between GPs and specialists, you'd frequently see things like "I'm amazed this nineteen year old girl even managed to get pregnant, given that she has a groteque appearance. I suspect there was some inbreeding involved". However that was back in the 60/70s. I think it's by law now that we can only document facts and professional opinions. No more extra info that would prepare or forewarn you about a patient.

Finally, as with all languages, there is evolution and extinction. Some languages are worth saving. This isn't one of them.
Author:  Linux_User [ Wed Mar 09, 2011 6:33 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Doctor slang is a dying art
cloaked_wolf wrote:
Okay, first and foremost, that article is EIGHT years old! It was published in 2003. Why are you posting it now?

It appeared in the "most read/shared" section earlier, so I imagine that might be why.
Author:  cloaked_wolf [ Wed Mar 09, 2011 7:29 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Doctor slang is a dying art
Yes I agree for some strange reason old articles do pop up but why not ensure it's a current topic before posting it?
Author:  steve74 [ Wed Mar 09, 2011 9:55 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Doctor slang is a dying art
Opps, sorry I thought it was a recent article, bleedin BBC website!

* slaps wrists *
Author:  E. F. Benson [ Wed Mar 09, 2011 9:15 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Doctor slang is a dying art
Paraphimosis.

All I need to say really. A spade is a spade.
Author:  cloaked_wolf [ Wed Mar 09, 2011 10:53 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Doctor slang is a dying art
E. F. Benson wrote:
Paraphimosis.

:?: That's not slang - it's a proper medical term. More than that, I've had to reduce quite a few in my time. Only real way is brute force and a bit of KY jelly.
Author:  jonbwfc [ Wed Mar 09, 2011 11:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Doctor slang is a dying art
cloaked_wolf wrote:
Only real way is brute force and a bit of KY jelly.

And a shoe-horn :shock:
Author:  E. F. Benson [ Sat Mar 12, 2011 7:57 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Doctor slang is a dying art
cloaked_wolf wrote:
E. F. Benson wrote:
Paraphimosis.

:?: That's not slang - it's a proper medical term. More than that, I've had to reduce quite a few in my time. Only real way is brute force and a bit of KY jelly.


I know it isn't slang. But to the layman....
Anyhow more power to your elbow. I have suffered the above affliction and it was no fun, had to be dealt with under a general. Followed by circumcision which I should have had at an earlier age, as he was always quite tight when aroused. But thats probably too much information eh.
I appreciate how it appears unprofessional to use such idioms. My experience in A&E at the time was just a tad embarrassing, as the juniors, male and female, came to test their Pythonesque treatments on my swollen glans. Dont tell me they weren't. However, alls well that ends well and young people are young, even if they train to be doctors.
Author:  steve74 [ Sat Mar 12, 2011 3:15 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Doctor slang is a dying art
E. F. Benson wrote:
However, alls well that ends well

:shock:
Er, quite!
:P
Author:  cloaked_wolf [ Sat Mar 12, 2011 4:49 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Doctor slang is a dying art
E. F. Benson wrote:
had to be dealt with under a general

Did no one try a local block (ie anaesthetise just your penis)? I've done one once and I'd imagine it's not pleasant for someone to jab a needle into your manhood but it's still safer than a general anaesthetic.

E. F. Benson wrote:
as he was always quite tight when aroused

Talking about your partner or your "Mr Benson"? :lol:

E. F. Benson wrote:
My experience in A&E at the time was just a tad embarrassing

TBH anyone who isn't at consultant-level can be called a junior doctor, even if they've been a doctor for ten years.
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