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Man jailed for five years after 'brandishing' sex aid
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Author:  Amnesia10 [ Sat Nov 24, 2012 1:20 am ]
Post subject:  Man jailed for five years after 'brandishing' sex aid

Man jailed for five years after 'brandishing' sex aid at armed police

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/9699349/Man-jailed-for-five-years-after-brandishing-sex-aid-at-armed-police.html

Quote:
Frightened neighbours called 999 when they thought they saw Ian Poulton, 33, with a pistol tucked into the waistband of his trousers in May.
Officers rushed to the quiet street in Hadley’s Hall Gardens area, near Telford, arriving minutes later armed with machine guns and accompanied by a specialist dog unit.
Other residents on the street were astonished by the arrival of the “Robocops”, but the operation descended into farce when they seized the weapon, only to discover he had in fact been “brandishing” a silver sex aid.
Jailing Poulton on Wednesday, Judge Robin Onions said: “It was clearly not a gun, be it imitation or real. It was an entirely innocent object. [But] it was the defendant’s intention to deceive.
“Witnesses thought it was a firearm so he has to take the consequences.”
Speaking at the time of the incident, a neighbour said: “I think this is what you might call a classic cock-up.
“Nobody could believe what they were seeing when these armed Robocops turned up on the street from nowhere. Hadley can be a tough area but it’s not that bad, surely?

Maybe they were worried that he had played Grand Theft Auto and thought that he was going to club someone to death with his dildo?

Author:  pcernie [ Sat Nov 24, 2012 1:28 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Man jailed for five years after 'brandishing' sex aid

It's a funny story in itself, but Robin Onions? That's just the icing on the cake :)

Author:  Amnesia10 [ Sat Nov 24, 2012 3:13 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Man jailed for five years after 'brandishing' sex aid

pcernie wrote:
It's a funny story in itself, but Robin Onions? That's just the icing on the cake :)

Maybe he is in the wrong profession?

Author:  jonbwfc [ Sat Nov 24, 2012 8:23 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Man jailed for five years after 'brandishing' sex aid

Amnesia10 wrote:
Maybe they were worried that he had played Grand Theft Auto and thought that he was going to club someone to death with his dildo?

Saint's Row 3 actually /geek.

Author:  pcernie [ Sat Nov 24, 2012 9:44 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Man jailed for five years after 'brandishing' sex aid

jonbwfc wrote:
Amnesia10 wrote:
Maybe they were worried that he had played Grand Theft Auto and thought that he was going to club someone to death with his dildo?

Saint's Row 3 actually /geek.


There's a PS2 GTA game where a mission takes place in a police station, there's one in the showers IIRC.

Author:  ProfessorF [ Sat Nov 24, 2012 9:46 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Man jailed for five years after 'brandishing' sex aid

It's in GTA San Andreas too.

Author:  Amnesia10 [ Sat Nov 24, 2012 4:06 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Man jailed for five years after 'brandishing' sex aid

jonbwfc wrote:
Amnesia10 wrote:
Maybe they were worried that he had played Grand Theft Auto and thought that he was going to club someone to death with his dildo?

Saint's Row 3 actually /geek.

Well done I would never remember that. :oops: Though I vaguely remember we discussed a giant pink dildo killing someone in this forum and bobdobbs has my comment as part of his signature. I thought it was GTA not knowing which edition.

The fun will start when he is inside and if he says carrying an offensive dildo I doubt his prison status will be enhanced by it.

Author:  Paul1965 [ Sat Nov 24, 2012 5:34 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Man jailed for five years after 'brandishing' sex aid

I wonder if he lives alone.

Author:  Amnesia10 [ Sat Nov 24, 2012 5:59 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Man jailed for five years after 'brandishing' sex aid

Paul1965 wrote:
I wonder if he lives alone.

Are you wondering if it was his dildo or he borrowed it? I wonder what forensics will discover on it? :shock:

Author:  davrosG5 [ Tue Nov 27, 2012 6:53 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Man jailed for five years after 'brandishing' sex aid

Death by dildo also occurs in Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels IIRC.

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