So far, I’ve not seen him - which in itself is upsetting. He’s very weak and can’t cope well with visitors. What with all the attention he’s getting from the medical staff, he just gets mentally wasted very quickly - he’s asked us not to go until he’s able to cope better. So at the moment, my sister and I have been keeping a distance - my mum’s doing the visits at the moment. I was really hoping that he’d be able to see us by now - I’d be over there like a shot if I could.

It’s a horrid waiting game. We have to see if the mega-medication he’s on helps before a decisions about whether to operate or not is made. I’m told 3 days, so unless something needs to be done urgently, we’ll know what’s what by Sunday.

Oh, I understand that one. My dad was like that for a while, it made it even more difficult being a couple of hours drive away.

Hang in there mate. Dad's often try to protect their kids no matter how old they are, trouble is that can get more stressful than actually going to see them. Buggers.

I got around it by harassing him with random texts.

I think that there is some pride in there - but I know from personal experience that when you are really mentally and physically tired, you can’t be doing with a huge amount of attention. My dad will be dealing with nurses, doctors, registrars and who knows who else in the medical team - and that will be dreadfully tiring for him.

The plan is for my sister and I to literally pop our heads round the door on Saturday to say hello. Just a few minutes so he know we’re there and around. Sunday is the day when the decision to operate is made, and may probably be the day it’s done.



Hanging in as best I can. It’s going to get a bit bumpy over the next week I think.

Woah. That's a lot to take. I think seeing your parents in that state has an impact on you, and not being able to see them...can't imagine how you feel! Hope your dad pulls through and recuperates quickly.


FWIW, registrars are doctors too!

I got to see him over the weekend. He's looking comfortable and happy - but still very weak. We ar just waiting to see what the medical team's plan is now as the deadline fornsurgery passed over the weekend. I think their strategy is changing from urgent control and emergency cut to a longer game plan. They have said that surgery is the grey last thing they want to do. There is going to be a case meeting tomorrow where a plan will be drawn up.

Meanwhile, dad just wants them to do the work and let him home. I think he's wanting to get it all over and done with.

As ever, thoughts and good vibes are winging across the Thames Estuary in your direction.

Hopefully, this time, I'll get the trajectory right and you won't get the Southend mud spatter as well.

Well, he had his operation last Thursday. He’s picking up quickly now - and eating again (he had a colostomy so diet is going to be restricted and controlled for a while as things heal and he gets used to the new system). It seems that since the operation he’s finding his strength of character again, and he’s wanting to be independent again. He’s mobile - albeit slowly - and I think he’s finding the wound more of an inconvenience than anything else.

He’ll be in for a few more days - probably won’t be home before the weekend as the hospital are monitoring his blood picture to ensure that toxins are properly cleared and that, obviously, he is able to walk, look after himself, etc.. It’s all looking positive, and it seems that Christmas will be better than we thought it would be, and by the spring he should be bounding about like he used to.

The bugger is that it’s snowing, and I have a slight cold, so travelling to see him is out of the question until both have cleared.

*thumbs up*

Good to hear something positive at last!

2010 was a difficult but good year for me.

• Had to live for 3 months without Mrs. B. - FAIL
• Couldn't find a job - FAIL
• Did mum's house up so that it sold in October - UBER WIN
• Had to move south - WIN & FAIL
• Living somewhere lovely - WIN
• Got married - MEGA UBER SUPER WIN

Yeah. Finally - 2010 is almost over. I have to wish time away like this, but January 1st 2011 is a date we are all looking forward to in this house.

It struck me and my GF last night that it's only been a year since my dad died, it seems ages and yet just like yesterday, so I'm glad to here you'll be able to see in the new year with your dad, even if it is just with a cup of tea. Good news.

That sounds like fantastic news! I hope he doesn't over do things and tries to get back to "normality" too quickly. Fingers crossed for a speedy recovery.

I'm genuinely unsure whether you intended that spelling mistake or not

Thanks. It is good news - but I think he knows his limitations - he tires easily and obviously mobility is a problem because of the operation. Generally, though, he’s feeling better - he’s being taken off the various medications he was on, and he’s being encouraged to sit in his chair by the bed as much as he can now it seems, as well as move around the ward. Hopefully, he’ll be out soon - but because he was very debilitated when he was admitted, they want to build him up and get him as strong as they can before sending him home.

Again, I can’t get to see him because of the snow at the moment. I am under instructions from him not to travel at the moment because of the weather. Hopefully the it will improve soon and I can get there to see him again.