Ok, so I would never normally even think about this, but...

A few years ago (about 10-15) I had a paronychia infection on my thumbnail. Due to the fact that my immune system was cocked up it had to be drained (is cut open and allowed to bleed to clean it etc).

I was fascinated!

Anyway, about a week ago I felt the same thing starting. I left it in the hope it would go away... It didn't. It got to the point where I couldn't lift anything as it was killing me.

So I decided to have a go at self correcting

Burned a safety pin, and set about it (very carefully). It seemed to work although it was quite painful.

Anyway, that was 2 days ago. Now my finger is back to normal and apart from a little scratch there is nothing to see.

I know it's something that should never be recommended but I knew what I was doing

Right, anyone got any open heart operations they need doing? I have a spare safety pin here!

If you'd have come to A&E, someone would have done the same thing with a sterile needle. Heat it up and apply some pressure - penetrates the nail and allows the pus to drain.

When I was a teenager, I managed to remove a warty growth on my finger with a stanley knife. I had at attempt at sorting out an ingrowing toenail (but made it worse).

Haven't done much beyond that. The problem with self-surgery is the complications that arise, either from the attempted procedure itself (eg slipped knife chops off a digit!) or afterwards (eg infection). Given these risks and complications can't all be removed even with the appropriate surgeon, equipment, environment etc, it's rather foolhardy to try to do too much.

Having said that, a surgeon was isolated in (I think) Antarctica. He developed the signs and symptoms of appendicitis and performed surgery on himself! I'll try to find a link at some point.

Same here, but I used a Leatherman. Bled like.... uhm... well a whole lot, let me tell you.

Luckily this didn't require going through my nail as the infection was off the side of my nail on the finger itself.

Don't know of I'd have been able to do it if I had to go through my nail though. Lol

I used the safety pin as a cutting tool but only needed a 2mm ish incision.

I've done something similar with really bad zit / boil type things that refused to come to a head. I had one on my chin when I was about 19 that just kept growing until I couldn't even move my jaw. I lanced it with a sterilised razor blade and squeezed out about 100ml of disgusting stinky puss! A few days later after repeated applications of TCP it was all cleared up.

Compared to some "field surgery" that's extremely minor. I wouldn't attempt anything more serious, although the interwebs is full of crazy people doing very extreme things...

I was going to do something similar to a boil, but thought best not as it looked massive and serious. Convinced myself I had an abcess and went to my GP. He told me it wasn't an abcess, gave me the impression I was wasting his time, lanced it in the same way I was going to and gave me a lecture on smoking and drinking.

On a separate point, that's why I rarely go to a GP (that was the first time in 18 years). I'm well aware that smoking and drinking are not good for me!

^^^The GP would have had to ask. Doesn't get paid otherwise.

Really? Bloody hell. I guess the government think we're idiots. I suppose we are if we do things that are bad for our health.

Most of the time the feeling's mutual. I understand the notion they're working to, but are there that many people out there who will take what their GP says to heart, or do we just all say 'yeah yeah' and then forget about it the moment we walk out of his office? Most of the time, to me, the only way people change their lifestyle is when the consequences of not changing happen either to them or someone they know well.

Jon

Part of the problem is the Govt's drive to improve healthcare. So how do they do it? Give all GP practices only half of their money and then make them "earn" the other half by getting the GPs to jump through hoops. They set up essentially "performance targets" where they have to meet around 90% of the target. One target could be checking to see who drinks/smokes and giving advice where necessary. If you don't meet a target, you don't get all of the remainder of the pay. If you met all of the targets (something the Govt didn't think GPs could do), you get the other 50% of the money.

And some auto-amputation...
http://www.guardian.co.uk/film/2010/dec/15/story-danny-boyles-127-hours

I could do that a bit quicker with my "pyrotechnics"

Every time I go to an asthma check up they ask me if I smoke. If I smoked, I doubt I would have been able to make it in.

Chuck Norris by any chance?