Unfortunatly we'd probably have to go the support team and get something like that done (and seeing as there are around two and a half files already they probably wouldn't like it), or spend far too much on adding the functionality.
My main problem with this is the fact that under a *NIX environment I could do it, and I could do it fast, perhaps even scripting the whole thing. Not only is it not possible under Windows, even if it was this system has been so locked down and poorly put together that it would probably take forever anyway...
Thanks for your help everyone, I've learnt a number of things, which is always a positive
