I would prefer Alan Johnson, to either of the Millibands.

I would prefer Alan Johnson, to either of the Millibands. Labour without Gordon will be more electable. I am not so sure who the DUP will support. Plus an early election will drain Lord Ashcroft of more money, though hopefully he will not be allowed to fund the Tories any longer this year.

The Millibands, to use a slight misquote, are pure ambition wrapped in skin

:o

Gordon Brown just announced that he will stand down as leader once a new government is formed

Really hoping this doesn't lead to a Lab-Lib coalition. The Wench has said she wants to move to France, I might just end up pushing the issue if that happens.

Really hoping this doesn't lead to a Lab-Lib coalition. The Wench has said she wants to move to France, I might just end up pushing the issue if that happens.

'Just like going back to school': new MPs arrive at Westminster

It's freshers week in parliament. The new MPs wear green stickers on their lapels – "learner badges", one calls them – and they gather in Portcullis House, blinking with surprise that they actually made it.

Conor Burns, the new Conservative MP for Bournemouth, said: "It's daunting, it's just like going back to school. I can't quite believe it's really happened. Last week I was looking up to all these MPs and now they are my colleagues."

The rookies are met by the house doorkeepers who, in time, are expected to remember all 649 MPs' names. Today they have crib-sheets to help them. They are ushered into a reception centre, then do an induction loop around the gallery of committee rooms that line Portcullis House.

They stop in the first room to collect their security passes, the second to be issued with a laptop, and the third for their signing on with the Independent Parliamentary Standards Authority, who will pay their salary and expenses. In a historical hangover, at some point they will also be shown their personal hook to hang their swords on.

The reception system was designed to cope with 350 new MPs but results last week mean it is dealing with just 226. This morning trade was slow for the doorkeepers, who had welcomed around 20 new members by 11.30am. Robin Fell, the deputy principal doorkeeper, said: "We are expected to be able to recognise and greet new MPs. The ideal number of new MPs for any member of staff is about eight. We've got more than 200."

Fell and his 30-strong crew of doorkeepers then give personal tours of the parliamentary estate but new members will have to wait some weeks until they are allocated an office. The whips decide who gets which office, with the ruling party given priority. An operation on this scale has never been attempted before in a hung parliament.

Robert Halfon, the new Conservative MP for Harlow, said: "It's like arriving at a new school – or university. You get issued with a computer, pass, phone number. In the days of BlackBerries you don't even need an office."

But this new intake is operating to the unusual backdrop of a hung parliament. Portcullis House is also the meeting point for returning MPs and journalists today, like second year students after the long summer break. But this time there's more to gossip about. Gordon Birtwistle, the new Liberal Democrat MP for Burnley, said: "It's mystifying. I've been here for an hour and I've got a pass, a laptop, a phone number and now I've got to go off to a meeting where we will decide whether to go into a government."

Others have a strategy to see them through the period of uncertainty and are even attempting to operate with one foot still on the election campaign pedal, in anticipation that there could be another election this year.

Liz Kendall, the new Labour MP for Leicester West, said: "I think it's really important to firm up all the support we built up in the constituency during the campaign. I want to get all those volunteers signed up members of the Labour party.

"You can only worry about the things you have any control over. I want to make sure I'm set up here and in the constituency and then strengthening the support we have there for whatever happens."

In the days of BlackBerries you don't even need an office.

And bring back the swords!