because in my case I know what its like to be popular as I currently stand and its extremely depressing etc, I have the burden of making friends far too easily to the point where I dont like it, I think its because for lots of years I was major introvert now extrovert and the "very introvert" still inside me a little bit as theres quite a few times where I cant be bothered to see anyone or talk to anyone yet at the same time I feel "bad" for not catching up with people, a contsant juggle, a nuisance to be totally blunt

You get used to it.

Make up your mind Bratty, you were whining about finding it difficult to talk to people not long back.

Your games are silly sometimes.

That is a totally introverted attitude Bratty, the fact is you are someone who sees social interraction as something that drains you of energy, extroverts in contrast need social interraction to provide them with a stimulus and motivation. It's important to respect each characrter trait, it's not bad to be an introvert, and it's not necessarily healthy to be an extrovert,

Ok, the two above posts make sense. But also, when I wrote that Bratty, I meant "with the ladies"

Not in the more general sense!

and FYI it just seems to be a "phase" these days as Im usually quite eager to go out and see people

You're just a bag of contradictions Bratty.

it seems so but Im trying to be overly precise as always (personality flaw) even more difficult to explain online

Caz, (and anyone else who wants to weigh in) is it wrong to spend time with an ex because you enjoy it, even though you know there may not be a future for "things"??

I have to say I get on well with all except one of my exes, certainly well enough to go to the pub or even dinner with them if the occasion came up. Much the same way I would with an old school friend say. No long term agenda, just company. I'm told I'm quite unusual in this regard though.

even if the relationship has no future then it might still be fine. I still have good relations with exes.

But you're in a relationship Jon, no? What if you're both single and there's a vibe of sorts....?

Personally I don't keep in touch with any of my exes. There are a couple I wouldn't mind being friends with if the chance arose. If you enjoy their company why not?

Absolutely.

I've lost touch with most of my ex girlfriends, but I'd be happy to catch up with any of them.

My most recent ex (who some of you will remember as Feeona) still chats with me sometimes, and we did meet up quite recently when both of us were single. Nothing happened, but it was nice to catch up. It was really rather comfortable to have no expectations and just chill out, although to be honest I was slightly disappointed that we didn't shag each others brains out. I pretty much had a hard-on for the entire weekend, but we slept in separate rooms. I felt positively unfulfilled when I dropped her off at the train station.

I'm not sure if it would have "meant something" if we had though. It's not something I've ever done, but I imagine that particular memory would have been filed along with our previous ones and not actually counted as something new. We both know 100% that we won't get back together because it doesn't work, so anything that might happen is somehow still a part of the past.

"New girlfriend" doesn't like me seeing her... but that's a different story.

Well, yeah. My other half hasn't ever said anything when I've met one of my exes but, iirc, she's always been there and it's been patently obvious there was nothing going on. I'm not sure she'd be happy for me to be going out for the night with one of them on my own, even though there really wouldn't be anything going on then either.


Well then (and this is just IMO) you're both single and the only people who might have a problem with it is you two. To be honest, I've never known for certain that any relationship was sure to last (I've had some really bad luck in that regard) so causing yourself stress by going against what you want to do because of what might happen doesn't seem like a good idea.

That makes me seem very flighty and impulsive I know. It's more.. you can't predict the future. Things could change radically tomorrow. I don't see the point of not doing something that could make you happy today, due to the possibility it might not make you happy tomorrow. I think maybe you have to be fairly... thick skinned to live like that though.

+1 (well 2 pyscho ex's in my past, who I wouldn't want to meet again, but the others have remained friends over the years.)