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The Ranting (or Venting) Thread. 
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Interesting. I was gonna try some combo of a coconut and a lime scented product so I'd smell like a million dollars! 8-)

I think I'll go for a shaving cream. Been looking at Taylors of Bond Street and Trufitt&Hill products.

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Thu Jan 26, 2012 12:18 am
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cloaked_wolf wrote:
Interesting. I was gonna try some combo of a coconut and a lime scented product so I'd smell like a million dollars! 8-)

I think I'll go for a shaving cream. Been looking at Taylors of Bond Street and Trufitt&Hill products.


Taylors creme isn't bad. It's a tad dry compared to GFT. The Bodyshop do quite a nice shaving cream.

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I've only ever done it with a chicken so far, but if required I wouldn't have any problems doing it with other animals at all.


Thu Jan 26, 2012 9:35 am
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I have some gaps in my NI contributions. I've been trying to get a definitive figure so I can get the gaps filled.

Every statement I get has different numbers on it. The current one even includes the following pleasantry:

HM Revenue & Customs Self Employment Services wrote:
Failure to pay may result in legal action being taken against you and you may also have to pay NICs at a higher rate.


Nice. It's not that I don't want to pay. I just don't want to have to keep paying random numbers without having an answer to the letter I wrote to them back in December. :evil:

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Thu Jan 26, 2012 4:39 pm
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HeatherKay wrote:
It's not that I don't want to pay. I just don't want to have to keep paying random numbers without having an answer to the letter I wrote to them back in December. :evil:

I've got the same problem.

F***ing amateurs!

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Thu Jan 26, 2012 4:42 pm
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I want to meet the designers of Microsoft Word 2010 and follow them around all day slightly correcting everything they do, if they select a Crunchie from the vending machine for instance, I'll slightly correct this to a Twirl. If they put anything down on their desk, I'll move it, align it in some arbitrary way. I'll listen to them on the phone and suggest words they should have used.

Alternatively I want to smash their faces in with a cricket bat, all of them, even the women.


Thu Jan 26, 2012 8:40 pm
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I hear that Chris.

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Thu Jan 26, 2012 8:47 pm
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I used Excel today. It excels at being a smartarse that doesn't know what you want...

Not Deleting the Critical leading zeros on phone numbers requires importing a csv as text and manually setting the header to text. Then, when you save it it either leaves off the quotes or doubles them up! It's often quicker to use f*cking Notepad...

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Thu Jan 26, 2012 9:11 pm
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JJW009 wrote:
I used Excel today. It excels at being a smartarse that doesn't know what you want...

Not Deleting the Critical leading zeros on phone numbers requires importing a csv as text and manually setting the header to text. Then, when you save it it either leaves off the quotes or doubles them up! It's often quicker to use f*cking Notepad...


Really randomly... do you fancy explaining how you do this?!
I use excel every day to record customer information and when I was given the document all the zeros were gone from the front of the numbers and I decided against trying to rectify it. I would be interested to know how it can be done...


Thu Jan 26, 2012 10:02 pm
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If it's a one off procedure I'd just use concatenate into a column of cells formatted as text.

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Thu Jan 26, 2012 10:40 pm
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Concatenating is fine if the number of leading zeros is always the same. This is not the case with phone numbers, where UK numbers in local format begin with a single zero and international with double zero.

The process I use is to rename the file to wotever.txt and then open it. You get the import wizard thing. The critical step is to highlight all the columns and set them to type "text". If quotes are involved, you also need to deselect the "text identifier" option.

Of course, Excel then spends the rest of the day underlining all the phone numbers with a wiggle and shouting at you "This is numbers not text it is it is I tell you! Let me sort them numerically! I want to do maths on them!"

I really wish there was a "leave my data the hell alone and just show it like it is" button... Maybe there is, but I don't know anyone that found it yet :|

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Thu Jan 26, 2012 11:14 pm
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HMRC on-hold music is awful.

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Fri Jan 27, 2012 10:26 am
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JJW009 wrote:
Of course, Excel then spends the rest of the day underlining all the phone numbers with a wiggle and shouting at you "This is numbers not text it is it is I tell you! Let me sort them numerically! I want to do maths on them!"

I really wish there was a "leave my data the hell alone and just show it like it is" button... Maybe there is, but I don't know anyone that found it yet :|


The one feature it truly needs!

What they will do next is this: when you try and import something that may have phone numbers in, it will pop up with a clippy-type wizard that says "It looks like you're trying to import phone numbers. What would you like to do?" There are three options: the first imports them as a number so you loose the zeroes, the second always crashes the PC, and the third will randomly assign the column entries to either numbers or text...


Sat Jan 28, 2012 12:46 pm
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Stupid batteries. Why u no magically charged!

Now I can't take the photos I wanted to until later.

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Sat Jan 28, 2012 1:14 pm
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Did you not have back up batteries?

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Sat Jan 28, 2012 2:08 pm
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[LIFTED] dry cleaners closing at 15:00 on a Saturday and closed all say Sunday.
Put one of Faye's jackets in on Wednesday and they said "It should be ready on Saturday afternoon". I left the house at 3, giving them the best chance to have had it ready, and they bloody closed when I got there. Now Faye doesn't have a jacket to wear for her interview on Monday so the whole weekend is buggered while we travel to Swansea tomorrow and see if they have it in stock. She works for the company that sells it so I don't know why she can't see if Swansea have it and then reserve it.

So many things to get done and now zero time to do them...


Sat Jan 28, 2012 5:21 pm
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