That's what happens when you hire professional models for a job.


You did notice the Russian flag bearer was Maria Sharapova, didn't you?


The majority of the British squad wasn't actually there. A big chunk of them are still in Portugal & another bunch were already in bed 'cos they are competing this weekend. No Victoria Pendleton, no Keri Anne Payne, no Jessica Ennis...


Not a good day for GB, no medals at all and the road cyclists making a bit of an arse of it.

All the sailors are in Weymouth, so they were missing too.

I think what happened with the cycling was that the team members were happy to support mark cavendish to a point, but didn't want to jeapardize their chances of winning medals in their own disciplines later. The commentators even mentioned what the other cyclists tactics might be before the start.

I saw a breif interview with mark cavendish after the event and he came across as a graceless [LIFTED]. It was the sort of interview that would make headline news if it came from a cricket, rugby or football player.

Just got home. Opening Ceremony was awesome.

I had a bit of an issue with Kenneth Branagh, dressed as Isambard Kingdom Brunel and quoting Shakespeare, living through the entire industrial revolution and the time of the Beatles etc. I also had a BIG problem with them using poor Mohammed Ali. He's barely in his mind any more, he looks worse and worse every time they wheel him out for this or that, I doubt he has any idea what is going on, why can't they just give him a bit of dignity and stop the dog and pony show? Are they going to keep displaying him when he's in his coffin?

Generally Awesomesauce and the fireworks were great, it's the best cauldron I've seen and I like the way they handled the lighting of it.

Surely if you were near death's door, and were given the opportunity to be at the centre of global respect and attention, you'd take it. Which he did, and seemed happy to be there.

Maybe you felt uncomfortable seeing an old guy who wasn't in good health, well he's the greatest, and if he wants to be there, let him - if we can include youth, we can include the elderly, it was all about inclusiveness, hence McCartney was allowed out.

He's got a rep of being a bit of a.. well, of being a bit. That's partly why Wiggins gets all the good coverage - the cycling press don't talk to Cavendish as much cos they know what he's like. I thought the campaign to get him to win Sports Personality a couple of years ago was laughable given his actual personality...

If that's the case then I'm very happy to have seen him there, although he really didn't seem to be aware of where he was or what he was doing. Obviously I can't know for sure whether he was enjoying himself and perhaps they didn't make it look that way, but it really looked as though he had been dressed up and brought out.

I'm not uncomfortable about him being old and ill, I may well end up in the same situation if my Parkinsons develops along those lines, I just hate the idea that a legend like Ali would be used as a promo puppet, showing him broken down and betrayed by his body isn't the kind of legacy I can imagine him wanting to leave in peoples minds, but I guess we'll never know.

I missed the opening ceremony, which I now wish I hadn't, but what was Ali doing there?! What relevance does he have to the uk's heritage, or am I missing something else?

Edit: my father-in-law's just informed me he won gold once. Slightly more clued up, but still don't see that as a reason to include him in the uk opening ceremony so many years later.

All the bearers of the Olympic rings flag weren't necessarily sports people, there were all people who "deserved honouring".

I refer you to my earlier rant about that silly cow from liberty being there.

You could say he won it as a different person . I don't think having him there was necessary and I have some sympathy for Zippy's view that having him there in his current fragile state, even given he is arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of the modern age (and, let's be honest, he's not going to be around much longer the way things are going) was, if not exploitative then at least unfortunate. I'm prepared to give them the benefit of the doubt that they meant well but it was perhaps a small misstep.

However, I've been thinking about the opening ceremony and the more I think about it the more pleased I am with it. The 'pandemonium' section and the cauldron sections reveal more and more the more you look at them. Look at this - this is the speech from 'The Tempest' that Kenneth Branaugh performed at the start of the Pandemonium section



At the time I took that to be Brunel talking to the people in front of him, trying to reassure them that the coming of industry would bring prosperity. But it works another way too - it works as a greeting by Britain to the rest of the world - It's saying 'Ok, we're a bit strange, and some of the things we do may seem a bit scary but actually we're OK once you get to know us'. There are things like that all the way through it. Almost everyting works at more than one level. And the music goes with it. The Glennie piece is actually incredibly complicated - it's got multiple percussion lines laid over with inter-twined synth carillons as a rhythm/string section and a melody line built around whistling (for pity's sake) but it works; it ends up both quite gothic and at the same time uplifting. And the whole thing ends on the fantastic image of the iron olympic rings, freshly forged, sparking and burning. It's just.. it's genuinely one of the best pieces of stage work I've seen in years. Every producer in the West end must have thought 'Christ, I might as well give up'.

And then from that, you drop back to Daniel Craig and The Queen and mickey-taking corgis. And that works if anything even better....

Jon

Do you mean Shami Chakrabarti? The person who does epic work with the National Council for Civil Liberties?

By the way, the Norwegian flagbearer was..



Mira Veraas Larson, who is apparently a canoeist. She is quite attractive, to be fair..

Oh, can we not?

Just watching the women's team archery. One of the Danish women has her hat pulled so far down her head I'm amazed she made it to the line, let alone hitting a target 200 feet away .

Some of the best photos in the press from the opening Ceremony (thumbnails, as some of them are quite large)