I'd threaten you but you'll have killed yourself soon enough

cant blast me away with your farts on me im afraid, ive got a complete soviet gasmask in perfect working order

Unless you have an underground cave of prototype armaments, Ernie, I'd say Bratty has you out-gunned. Choose your words wisely.

That's the thing about our respective countries - we could probably kill each other with a phone call

Just great. Christmas Eve is probably not the best time to go and break a tooth. [LIFTED]!

I imagine it's a common occurrence, what with the dates, nuts and boiled sweets people eat at this time of year - hope you can get it sorted out quickly.

Araldite sticks most things

I wouldn't be so annoyed if I were eating nuts but it was sweet and sour chicken and I think I may have swallowed the broken bit

you will turn into me now fake teeth with metal bars in them

Bought an 'intelligent' HDMI splitter as mentioned elsewhere, didn't work (in fact it 'snows' the PS3 signal). eBay seller says how about I refund you £4 and you don't return the item, when the item cost £7 (postage was free even by eBay's [LIFTED] standards). Don't think so, so we'll see how this goes

God damn this hotel room is freezing, and the bathroom is even colder. Which idiot thought a small storage heater was good enough to cope with a Scottish winter?
And the buggers don't start serving breakfast until after I have to check out in the morning.

People who queue but don't need to.

When shopping, I've seen say 4-5 people in the queue at the check out but only one of them is buying anything. Similar story when queueing for the parking ticket machine.

If you're not going to use the service, WHY ARE YOU QUEUEING? The only exception I will allow are for kids who need to be supervised.

I had to complain in the end.
I draw the line at the shower temperature ranging between cold and boarder line freezing.
Their response: "You need to let it run for at least ten minutes to get hot water when the hotel isn't busy."

I'm guessing your Trip Advisor review is not going to be terribly complimentary.

1. Turned up to work today and the door to my consulting room wouldn't unlock. Had to get the door broken and the lock replaced. Surprising how easily security locks can be "bypassed".
2. How feckin dim do you have to be to call your GP three hours after your relative became unconscious and you sat there for the three hours instead of calling 999?