Have you ever considered moving out?

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I think he counts as their carer.

I should definitely be paid for putting up with it! Yes, every day I think about moving out, but it's a case of putting myself thousands of pounds in debt more than I need to. That's the short version

Costa "baristas" - How can an iced latte be so warm that the ice cubes melt?

Oh, and there was not a hint of caramel in there either.

I would have bothered to complain had I not used the drive through and was already on my way out of the retail park.

So I've read a summary of rough draft of NICE guidelines on osteoporosis. They now recommend that we do not offer paracetamol for pain relief. Given that anti-inflammatories (like ibuprofen and diclofenac) are a no-no (stomach bleeds), and co-codamol risks addiction, the only viable alternative is morphine!

And Morphine isn't addictive?

I've been off the diclofenac for a week now. The heel isn't hurting much, but now I'm feeling all the other pains the tablets have masked for the last year!

Staff at work. A patient has cancer and is undergoing treatment. Needs a sick note so get one done on friday. Receptionist rings up to inquire whether it's done. As I'm in surgery, I say "yes" and that if they want to, they can come and collect it. Another receptionist later books the patient in as a telephone consultation for the note. I normally ring telephone patients at the end of surgery. Figured it was a reminder for the note. Turns out the patient was sitting upstairs and had been waiting an hour. No one told me he was here! Wound me right up because I normally prioritise cancer patients and would have seen him or squeezed him in between patients. Anything to make sure he wasn't waiting. He had been waiting an hour before anyone told me he was here.

Don't fcuking think so - O2 specifically said your current contract would carry over

Just another phone call to make to a dumb-ass company

Three nil up after half an hour and now the match has been suspended.

Charlton should forfeit for being a bunch of hydrophobic ponces!

Maybe they are made of soap?

Why is it the best comics are the ones where the creators can never get the bloody thing out on time?

My mum was given cancer all clear in April but now doctor has called her back in for a possible operation.

Think positive thoughts

When the fcuk can we start genetically targeting flies? Not to wipe them out completely, just enough not to be a tipping point for the food chain. Now there's a war I could get behind...

Is a fly swat classified as a weapon of mass destruction 'of flies'?