If bits of Britain are like a foreign land, does that mean the weather's better and the beer's cheaper?

Really? Fourteen posts in and you invoke Godwin already?

It‘s these new-fangled immigrants that are wrong, you know. Not like there good old days when they were gentlemen and played the game according to the rules. You could spot an immigrant at 100 paces - they were generally black as the ace of spades, or at the very least brown. They certainly stood out, and gave a chap a sporting chance to cross the street, or to take a different route altogether. Didn’t have to mix with them. Gentlemen and scholars the lot of them for doing that.

These days, one can’t spot one until one’s within earshot. They’re sneaky buggers - getting in under the wire by being white. No fighting chance to avoid their foreign jabberings now. Had to call my driver to sort out one of them just the other day. Damn unsporting.

I've been told I sound Northern English. Does that count as doubly foreign then ?

Nah. It only counts as foreign if you're from The People's Republic Of Cornwall.

You don't sound northern, you just use a lot of northern'isms

Hey up!

My boss made a joke about this at our last meeting. my team is 80% foreign because there's noone to hire that's British. If the UK withdraws from the EU, the company will have to lose this competency completly. If we could get 5 engineers applying we'd probably take them right now :S