Let it be known all websites, users, applications, you have my permission, I allow you, to be [LIFTED] FULLSCREEN AFTER I ALREADY CLICKED FULLSCREEN and then you don't have to remind me that YOU'RE NOW [LIFTED] FULLSCREEN

Yes, but would you like to ineffectually save your settings, eh?

All I'm trying to do is arrange a bank appointment by phone, but no matter which contact number I use it puts me into the same system that requires ID numbers etc I don't have. I seem to recall going over there before and being told to call them first

I do enjoy it when I know I'm entering the correct password and a site tells me I'm not...

I unwittingly bought foreign Uxbridge Coke - it's absolutely lifeless compared to the stuff we produce locally.

I'm about ready to kill the fcuking kids round here - they do nothing but scream at each other. They're not even fighting either!

First my genius of a father has not only set the printer in the kitchen, he's hidden the proprietary power cable.

Then when transferring files to my backup drive, the fcuking laptop's HDD locks up!

Amazon and their frikkin weekend deliveries. I normally get stuff delivered to work because I'm there all day from 0800 till1830 and it's easier than having to faff around with travelling to depots or getting stuff handed to our gypsy neighbours who take it upon themselves to open and play with whatever's inside and deny all knowledge.

So now I find that the package is gonna be delivered tomorrow (originally it had said next week) and the surgery is shut. And there's no option to avoid/delay the weekend attempt.

Sky Now - 'what do you mean you want to watch the shows you've paid for without error codes?!'

seems to me you need a good solid wall to bang your head against Ernie.
Of course I can't help with that but...

When I'm not actually surrounded by idiots, I've often got them ruining technology...

The new Projects Co-ordinator is really starting to get on my tits

He's asked me 17 times in three days what I'm doing - the answer has only changed once.

Make a sign that you can hold up when he asks you again.

"answering your stupid questions"

I get "do you have an update?" every week.

I feel like I should reply "Did I provide you with an update?"