| Author |
Message |
|
l3v1ck
What's a life?
Joined: Fri Apr 24, 2009 10:21 am
Posts: 12700
Location: The Right Side of the Pennines (metaphorically & geographically)
|
I'd like to tell you a joke about a herb and a fish, but this isn't the thyme or the plaice.
|
| Tue Aug 08, 2017 2:17 am |
 
|
|
|
John_Vella
I haven't seen my friends in so long
Joined: Fri Apr 24, 2009 7:55 am
Posts: 7935
Location: Manchester.
|
The wife told me to stop standing like a flamingo. I had to put my foot down.
_________________John Vella BSc (Hons), PGCE - Still the official forum prankster and crude remarker  Sorry  I'll behave now. Promise 
|
| Tue Nov 07, 2017 11:52 am |
|
|
|
John_Vella
I haven't seen my friends in so long
Joined: Fri Apr 24, 2009 7:55 am
Posts: 7935
Location: Manchester.
|
Going to see the physiotherapist soon. Great sense of humour, that girl... She's always pulling my leg!
_________________John Vella BSc (Hons), PGCE - Still the official forum prankster and crude remarker Sorry I'll behave now. Promise
|
| Tue Dec 12, 2017 4:26 pm |
|
|
|
l3v1ck
What's a life?
Joined: Fri Apr 24, 2009 10:21 am
Posts: 12700
Location: The Right Side of the Pennines (metaphorically & geographically)
|
An old man drove past me on a tractor this morning, and told me the end was nigh...
I think it was Farmer Gedden
|
| Sat Mar 17, 2018 5:51 am |
|
|
|
Burn_IT
Has a life
Joined: Fri Dec 13, 2013 6:44 pm
Posts: 90
Location: Polesworth
|
He'd been in the fields sowing wild oats and forgotten to zip up!!
_________________I cannot remember the last time I forgot something
|
| Sat Mar 24, 2018 8:57 pm |
|
|
|
John_Vella
I haven't seen my friends in so long
Joined: Fri Apr 24, 2009 7:55 am
Posts: 7935
Location: Manchester.
|
Not a joke, as such, but this made me chuckle... A mate recently posted on BookFace "Feeling sh1t" Hi mother-in-law instantly replied "Well put it down and wash your hands, you dirty basterd!"  _________________John Vella BSc (Hons), PGCE - Still the official forum prankster and crude remarker Sorry I'll behave now. Promise
|
| Mon Feb 11, 2019 9:13 am |
|
|
|
pcernie
Legend
Joined: Sun Apr 26, 2009 12:30 pm
Posts: 45931
Location: Belfast
|
Might apply for a job at the mirror factory.
I could see myself working there.
_________________Plain English advice on everything money, purchase and service related:
http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/
|
| Sun May 31, 2020 3:07 pm |
|
|
|
Burn_IT
Has a life
Joined: Fri Dec 13, 2013 6:44 pm
Posts: 90
Location: Polesworth
|
My wife and I went to the marriage guidance councillor last week.
We had to tell him to stop crying and get over it; we are not going to split up.
This is not far from a true story when we were sent to a psychiatrist for help over my wife's mother's death (which wasn't needed -the help that is)
_________________I cannot remember the last time I forgot something
|
| Mon Jun 01, 2020 5:47 pm |
|
|
|
John_Vella
I haven't seen my friends in so long
Joined: Fri Apr 24, 2009 7:55 am
Posts: 7935
Location: Manchester.
|
There's been a lot of controversy regarding the author of the Bible recently.
A friend of mine believes that God wrote it.
Personally, I think he got a Holy Ghost writer.
_________________John Vella BSc (Hons), PGCE - Still the official forum prankster and crude remarker Sorry I'll behave now. Promise
|
| Wed Aug 26, 2020 1:39 pm |
|
|
|
l3v1ck
What's a life?
Joined: Fri Apr 24, 2009 10:21 am
Posts: 12700
Location: The Right Side of the Pennines (metaphorically & geographically)
|
Why can't Trump go back to the Whitehouse?
It's ForBiden.
|
| Mon Nov 09, 2020 11:34 pm |
|
|
|
John_Vella
I haven't seen my friends in so long
Joined: Fri Apr 24, 2009 7:55 am
Posts: 7935
Location: Manchester.
|
Ooh, a topical one! _________________John Vella BSc (Hons), PGCE - Still the official forum prankster and crude remarker Sorry I'll behave now. Promise
|
| Tue Nov 17, 2020 5:35 pm |
|
|
