That wasn't really my point. There are numerous women out there that are single mothers. They're single mothers as there is no male partner around any more and they have to continue without them. What do you think the likelihood is that they stop at just the one? There are a heck of a lot of young lasses out there that don't even know who the father is, because of the alcohol involved when they got together for the night.

And many men are in relationships but are also getting out there and having sex with other women too. Does that not succinctly prove my point? It's unlikely just for the pleasure, because they're probably getting that already. Maybe there are factors such as it not being enough from that partner, or maybe it is for the novelty, or maybe even it's as I say it is, but at the end of the day it's what their genes demand and so they do it what ever the reasons that people find to rationalise the behaviour.....they miss the most obvious rationale of them all.

TBH i respectfully disagree, i would say that those people who are single mothers are not usually so by choice. If at the time of intercourse they were told that they were definitely going to get pregnant and given the option to use protection i wonder how many would agree to it ? Obviously i don't know the situation nor can i say for definite, but i would think that the majority would take up the offer.

As for your point regarding the males having extra-marital/relationship relationships (:?), i agree that one cannot completely say, however i would lean more towards the novelty, excitement and pleasure. You have to take into account that sex was "made" (for lack of a more scientific word) to be pleasureful in order to encourage it, thus i would say that "spreading the gene pool" is more of a side effect rather than a main goal for humans, a deliberately intended side effect but nonetheless still an effect and not a cause (i think that's in the right order).

Also, you state the many men who are active with more than one partner, and the many single mothers... but ultimately what is the percentage of the world's population that are in this state ? And compared with those who are in a "normal" relationship with a single partner ? It's easy to focus on a group because they're becoming either more prominent or feature more in the headlines etc., but if they aren't a majority then i doubt you can relate many, if any trends towards that social behaviour.

wrote this on cpcff originally, feel free to laugh at me etc



bleh, I knew there was no point in trying

Well done Bratty, apart from not asking her out, did you enjoy yourself? Do you feel that you connected in some way?
It doesn't sound that you failed, OK she didn't say yes to meeting up again, ask her again soon if she'd like to do it again.

Agree, that's definitely not a failure.

If you (and her) managed to have a fun time then it's still a step forward. Maybe not as big a step as you liked but a step nonetheless.

As for her not saying yes to meeting up again, she didn't say no either did she ? The impression seems to be that she's not sure when she'll be free (i.e. can't make a definitive date) due to being busy. Doesn't mean she won't offer to go out on a day when she does happen to be free though.

+ You should occasionally ask if she's busy during a certain week or if she's been busy to see if there's some time you could meet up. Maybe if not during the day, ask her if she wants to watch a film over at yours/hers in the evening or something ? (Depending on how close you two are/whether or not you think she'd accept etc.)

Also may i ask as to why you're feeling confused ? Or was it just as to why you felt like you "couldn't" (as such) ask her out ?

A couple of quotes from a fellow PUA and long time friend of mine I was just chatting to on messenger about my thread here

Bratty, it's called approach anxiety, okay you didn't have to do the approach because you already know her, but approaching is easier than making your interest known in a situation where you already know and have feelings for her. Where as with approaching a woman you have the fear that she may not want anything to do with you, the cold approach, you have the fear of actual direct rejection, which I would say is a bigger hurdle to get over than just approaching someone.

There are ways to get over it, drinking until drunk is one way. Or building up your confidence elsewhere is another. Once you realise that there's a whole world of women out there and that this one is just one amongst many then maybe you will be able to find the ability to raise the question; slowly and subtly of course.

Edit: okay, I think we might need a female opinion on this but my thinking is that she likes you and was disappointed that you didn't do enough to show that you'd like to be in a relationship with her. Would zippy et al like to comment?

She might be feeling hurt rejected and insecure if that's the case and thus is making excuses because of that. Or she actually isn't that fussed with you.

I'd give it a while to let her get over it, but then you're really going to have to plan what you do next. I don't mean in a PUA sense but how you're going to make your feelings known, subtly so that, if she's going to let you down, that she can do it gently. I'm sure the peeps here will help with that.

Why should one modify their behaviour? To conform to the local tarts? If they are different to the people in the area they are not mixing with people they are like. Why force oneself to be something one is not? My girlfriend likes me for who I am, I'm not strong, not the best at what I do, but I have morels and a good nature, that's her attraction. To say that's rubbish is to say the relationship I've been in for the last year and a half is rubbish.
I'm not tall, not really short, I'm rounded somewhat, have messy hair, have an accent which people seem to regard as posh, I'm geeky and quirky. She's hung around with skater people in the past, much stronger than myself, taller, slimmer, etc. She's an artist and classical, not liking gadgets and technology. Yet we click, our views of the world are very much the same, we have similar opinions, similar tastes and morels...



How long has your friend been using PUAs? Has your friend found this works? He's currently in a long term relationship with the result being a mortgage, kids and a wife to support?

Why would being rejected by a complete stranger be more hurtful than being rejected by a friend? Being rejected by a friend could lead to the lose of said friend...

Bratty, I'm not putting you off here, I think if you know someone then after a while you'll be able to gauge when the right time is. And even if you asked on the first 'date', the answer might be no then, but later it could be yes.

Why? Because the more women you meet, the more likely you are to find the one woman to make your life complete.

Your accent is a demonstration of higher value. Posh is associated with class and the higher people perceive your class, the higher your value. Women covet high value males and so you have ended up with this particular woman. If you consider her to be of high value too then you are suited with each other.



We have all been at it for around the 8 month mark though, none of us continuously, as we find ourselves in relationships. My friend is more successful than me I would say, even though I have the physique he has talent and greater confidence and conversational ability.

My friend has found that he can now get any girl's number fairly easily if he wants it. Even if she's involved with someone else. He also uses the confidence gained from it in his day to day life.

He'll find someone in time, though the person he currently likes is involved already and he'll not tread on the guys toes, and she wouldn't let him anyway.

That's what I was saying

yep had a grand day, and connected? I think so as shes usually antisocial as in quiet and never wants to talk to humans, but is really open with me and confident, shes shy but not shy with me if that make sense?



ye, cos of my "curse" Im kinda dwelling on how I didnt ask her out

forgot to add in previous post that I offered to pay but we both paid for our own as she insisted on paying for hers.

Also each time I see her I always give her a massive hug and she actually didn't want one this time because she had a cold so she jokingly ran away from me and I went after her and just latched onto her to make sure I give her big hug but she was like "argh dont hug me as I might pass on the cold onto you" but I just said "I dont care" then just went for it. was this appropiate? as I know her so well she didnt mind atall and I havent caught any cold

There's a lot of creepy weirdness in this thread - and None of it is from Bratty

Bratty, I wouldn't dwell on what didn't happen man, there's always next time As for the massive hug? You both know each other, so I can't see why it wouldn't be inappropriate. I reckon the latching on could have done quite a bit of good as well. And woot for the lack of cold man!!

Good luck for next time!

Bratty you're not the only one who is a bit unsure at times.

Anyway, sounds better than you made it out to be earlier. (y)