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Daily Mail-o-matic 
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Joined: Thu Apr 23, 2009 8:46 pm
Posts: 10022
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Generate your own Daily Wait headlines!

http://www.qwghlm.co.uk/toys/dailymail/

Here are some of the ones I got. Some have been quite scarily plausible!

COULD BINGE DRINKING HAVE SEX WITH THE MEMORY OF DIANA?
COULD GYPSIES GIVE YOUR DAUGHTERS DIABETES?
WILL TEACHERS DESTROY PROPERTY PRICES?
COULD CANCER STEAL FROM YOU?
WILL THE LABOUR PARTY MAKE TAXPAYERS' MONEY IMPOTENT?

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 7:46 am
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My Fave so far

Quote:
HAS THE METRIC SYSTEM RUINED CLIFF RICHARD?


Wed Aug 17, 2011 8:34 am
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I haven't seen my friends in so long
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Joined: Fri Apr 24, 2009 1:03 pm
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There used to be a Dibert version that produced "Pointy Haired Bossisums" they were great and I even used one once in a project report

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John_Vella wrote:
OK, so all we need to do is find a half African, half Chinese, half Asian, gay, one eyed, wheelchair bound dwarf with tourettes and a lisp, and a st st stutter and we could make the best panel show ever.


Wed Aug 17, 2011 10:05 am
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Joined: Fri Apr 24, 2009 1:03 pm
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Quote:
COULD HEALTH & SAFETY INFECT YOUR HOUSE WITH AIDS?

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John_Vella wrote:
OK, so all we need to do is find a half African, half Chinese, half Asian, gay, one eyed, wheelchair bound dwarf with tourettes and a lisp, and a st st stutter and we could make the best panel show ever.


Wed Aug 17, 2011 10:07 am
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hifidelity2 wrote:
Quote:
COULD HEALTH & SAFETY INFECT YOUR HOUSE WITH AIDS?

Or mac users with iAds?

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Do concentrate, 007...

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 10:21 am
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Joined: Fri Apr 24, 2009 6:06 pm
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Current favs...

Quote:
COULD YOUR LOCAL COUNCIL KILL THE QUEEN?

Quote:
HAS FEMINISM BURGLED YOU?

Quote:
ARE CHAVS HAVING SEX WITH YOUR PETS?

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 11:40 am
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Joined: Tue May 05, 2009 3:29 pm
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Quote:
HAVE IMMIGRANTS MADE TAXPAYERS OBESE?

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 12:43 pm
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Joined: Thu Jun 18, 2009 5:10 pm
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Quote:
COULD CHANNEL 4 GIVE THE MIDDLE CLASS SWINE FLU?


:lol:

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 12:59 pm
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HAS THE LOONY LEFT RIPPED OFF YOUR HOUSE?
HAVE THE FRENCH STOLEN FROM YOU?
COULD YOUR LOCAL COUNCIL RUIN BRITISH JUSTICE?
WILL THE UNEMPLOYED TURN YOUR PETS GAY?

But my favourite:
HAS THE BBC GIVEN DRIVERS SWINE FLU?

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 1:13 pm
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Joined: Thu Apr 23, 2009 9:40 pm
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WILL ASYLUM SEEKERS HURT YOUR CHILDREN?
ARE LESBIANS DESTROYING YOUR CHILDREN?
ARE THE UNEMPLOYED MAKING THE BRITISH PEOPLE OBESE?
COULD CANCER TURN THE BRITISH PEOPLE GAY?
ARE THE FRENCH DEVALUING CLIFF RICHARD?
WILL GAYS INFECT PENSIONERS WITH AIDS?
COULD FILTH ON TELEVISION RUIN YOUR HOUSE?
HAS TEENAGE SEX GIVEN THE QUEEN DIABETES?
WILL THE LABOUR PARTY INFECT THE QUEEN WITH AIDS?

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Macs are glorified Fisher-Price activity centres for adults; computers for scaredy cats too nervous to learn how proper computers work; computers for people who earnestly believe in feng shui.


Wed Aug 17, 2011 1:48 pm
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HAVE THE UNEMPLOYED SCROUNGED OFF CLIFF RICHARD?

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Do concentrate, 007...

"You are gifted. Mine is bordering on seven seconds."

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 2:19 pm
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Joined: Thu Apr 23, 2009 8:57 pm
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Location: Here for now...
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Quote:
ARE THE UNEMPLOYED TURNING YOUR PENSION GAY?


Quote:
HAVE CYCLISTS IMPREGNATED PENSIONERS?


Quote:
IS FILTH ON TELEVISION MAKING CLIFF RICHARD OBESE?



My favourite though...
Quote:
HAS THE INTERNET TURNED CLIFF RICHARD GAY?

I'm sure on some site's it probably has.

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 9:27 pm
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I haven't seen my friends in so long
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Joined: Thu Apr 23, 2009 6:58 pm
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They need a bigger dictionary.

Oh wait, it's the Daily Fail so actually I guess not :lol:

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Wed Aug 17, 2011 9:36 pm
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Blue_Nowhere wrote:
My favourite though...
Quote:
HAS THE INTERNET TURNED CLIFF RICHARD GAY?

I'm sure on some site's it probably has.

I always thought that the Bachelor boy was always dubious well before the internet. :lol:

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Do concentrate, 007...

"You are gifted. Mine is bordering on seven seconds."

https://www.dropbox.com/referrals/NTg5MzczNTk

http://astore.amazon.co.uk/wwwx404couk-21


Wed Aug 17, 2011 10:03 pm
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Joined: Thu Apr 23, 2009 7:26 pm
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"Has digital switchover made your dog a telly addict?"
No, its not. Apparently, that one's actually in today's edition....


Fri Aug 19, 2011 12:30 pm
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